35-Foot Robot Snake Weighs a Ton, Causes Nightmares

This is Titanoboa, a 50-foot long robotic snake weighing over 2,000-pounds that was modeled after the actual prehistoric snake of the same name and size. I say we kill it and turn it into cowboy boots. Or lady’s handbags — I don’t f***ing care, the important thing is that it’s killed.

The final product will have a more polished-looking skin and, if all goes well, be able to move underwater. Eventually, Titanoboa will support a rider, just like its relative, the Mondo Spider, which was built by the same group.

Brinson says Titanoboa is supposed to strike terror in people’s hearts by forcing them to contemplate historical climate change.

Of cooooooourse — climate change. It was so easy to connect those dots. Giant robotic snake, climate change — like two peas in a pod in an alternate universe where that actually makes any sense. “Don’t you get it? The original Titanoboa was extincted by climate change.” YOU CAN’T PROVE THAT! “Well it’s true.” Oh right, and you just expect me to believe some internet commenter? You said I eat penises in my last article!

Hit the jump for a video of Roboconda in action.


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